Daily Archives: May 8, 2013

The Fringe of Psychosis

Since last week’s short bout of psychosis I’ve been on edge.

I’ve been thinking about the last time this was an issue (in October when I thought my boss was trying to sabotage me at work) and wondering, quite nervously, if this was a one time blip or the fringe of something bigger.

Should I avoid the things that triggered it last time? Or is there a way to talk to the people involved to dissolve the overwhelmingly persistent delusions I am having? What’s worse is that I called out sick at my last therapy appointment (as I was psychotic) and I haven’t heard from my therapist since. I’ve called twice now with no answer, which only tends to add fuel to the already paranoid flames.

I feel like psychosis is one of those things that once you’ve experienced it, you can almost go crazy with the fear that surrounds it happening again. Should I lock myself indoors? Should I stay away from people?

How can I know if I am safe?

The most helpful thing I’ve found when it comes to psychosis is making a plan while it isn’t an issue. If you make a plan while stable (or stable-ish) to do whatever “x” when experiencing psychosis (whether that is call your doctor or therapist, take an emergency medication, or even force yourself into a state of hibernation) it takes a lot of the fear out of it. 

Even so, I have to admit I am scared. When life is already unpredictable, living with the possibility of psychosis can make things seem out of control. All I can do is watch for warning signs and follow through with my “plan” if it does come up.