A BD Note

Tomorrow is my 27th birthday, and I am left reflecting on my life and all that wonderfully serious gobbledigook that comes with the territory.

I had several things to say, but I’m finding myself at a total loss for words now. The geodon (which appeared to be working) is now apparently not, and the rolling waves of depression are being followed with steep energy drains  lasting 2-3 hours where I can’t stay awake to save my life. Needless to say, my judgement is a little clouded this morning, but it is likely things will pick up by this afternoon.



4 responses to “A BD Note

  1. First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Second, sometimes no amount of meds seem to be able to kick your illness into submission. At least that’s what I’ve found. This week is the first holiday week since the break up of my marriage (25 years). So I am going through similair ( definetly not same) problems. Tried whiskey on Monday. Did’nt do much except put me to sleep, which was preferable to being awake and feeling like my head was going to explode. Go eat a big piece of you favorite B-day cake, you deserve it!!!!

    • Thanks for the birthday wishes! I agree with you, and I’m sorry to hear about what you’re having to deal with right now, but if there is anything in my life I truly believe it is that things will get better. Obviously I don’t know the where or when or how to that statement, it is just what I’ve found in my own life. Things go up, they come down, and though the waves I’m riding are much larger than is typical for most, the fact that the variation even occurs keeps me going when I’m at the bottom. Something is bound to change, (because that is the nature of what we’re dealing with) and I’m definitely thankful for it!

  2. I will eat a big piece of pumpkin pie in honor of your birthday.

  3. Antidepressants alone will cause rapid cycling, Havinf had this happen (Bipolar II – leans DEPRESSION, not MANIA), and the Geodon might just not be for you. The body starts responding with consistent negativity, it’s time to “roll the bones” again. I’ve done it 20 or more times over 10 years of symptoms. No cocktail is ever safe. Just know, Mad-Eye Moody was right: “Constant vigilance!”

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